Spontaneous

God, when I think about it, the way you are just doesn’t make sense. Nothing is common about what you do. I sit in the airplane and look out my window. I look out yonder and I see mountains of clouds. Up here, they look like skyscrapers in the air. I look to the right and I see the glow of the sun poking through the clouds, giving everything beneath a misty halo. It’s beautiful…and I marvel.

Were I to be standing on the earth, the terrain would be much different. I would see mountains of rock  in the distance; and skyscrapers of brick and glass towering over me. Were I to be on the seas, things would still look different. I would see mountains of waves crashing against each other; and blue beds of water traveling to meet the sun at the horizon. This was all your plan. It doesn’t make sense – you are TOO BIG to contain.

Yet you are in me, working on the inside just like you have done on the outside. We make music together. First we start with a ballad. It’s smooth; it’s sweet. You inspire the words of the song – spontaneous. And I just follow you right along. What else would I do? Then in my heart, you play the trumpet. This trumpet purrs – it’s new. You give me the me the beat of drum: Tot – tot -tot; and the song changes tempo…all inside of my heart. And then you switch things up again – this time we’re doing country music. Country music with a kiwi feel. All inside of my heart, and you created it.

Then, we move from song to prose. You make my hands the hands of a ready writer. Then I listen to you as you form the sentences in my mind. All I do is write them down, like a copycat. What else would I do? I wait, I hear, I write. In one sitting you have take me from marveling, to singing, to writing. You have that spontaneous romance that all the gals look for. And you give it all to me free, free, free. You are TOO BIG to contain.

Yet you are in me, making beauty from the inside out. You stir me up unexpectedly; my time isn’t mine. Yet I don’t mind. Lovers don’t ask for permission to see each other. The way you are doesn’t make sense, yet I can I trust you totally. You are unpredictable, but I can trust you totally. You are spontaneous. I may not know where you are taking me at times, but I can bet it’s always good…always good.

I Am Your Bride

I am your bride. I am the one you would give anything to be with – including your life. I am the one you picked up from the dirt and cleansed. I am your bride. I am the one you waited patiently for, even when I didn’t notice you. You gave me your best gifts. I failed to accept them. You held out your arms to me. I didn’t run in to them. You got down on one knee, held out your ring to me. My eyes were elsewhere. You waited patiently for me, even though it pained you. I am your bride.

You memorize my smile, my laugh. You tuned your ears to my voice. You know just what I like.

I am your bride. You soothe me when I’m wary; you nurse me when I’m pained. You give and give and give to me. I am your bride; the apple of your eye. You hold my words dear. You want all my love. You love when I praise you; enjoy when I brag about you. Jesus, I am your bride. You trust me with your thoughts, you trust my heart with your dreams. I’m never lonely with you. I am your bride.

You teach me to be like you; so that when you look at me you see yourself. I am desirable to you; Because you have covered me. I am your bride. You protect me jealously. You guard me fiercely – no one can break your hedge about me. It’s too secure. I am your bride.

You cherish intimate moments with me. You enjoy being with me. You know where I am weak, yet you don’t love me any less. You know where I need to be built up, so I’m always your construction ground. I am your bride. You make me laugh. You give me a new song. You inspire me. You strengthen me. I am your bride. You clothe me perfectly. I am a sight to see. They all stop and stare. I am your bride.

 

My name is written on your heart. You give me a name that no one else knows. I am your bride. You know all my days; you number the hairs on my head. I am your bride. You saved me from the pit. You saw beauty in me when I only saw ashes. You saw strength when I only saw weakness. I am your bride. Marrying you was a major upgrade. My name now carries the highest premium – Christ. I am your bride.

I am your bride…

I am your bride…

I am your bride

Soundtrack to My Night: 11:19PM

Now Boarding

I’m not sure if I’ve shared this before, but I work in consulting – I’ve been doing it for about 13 months now. If you are familiar with the consulting practice you know that it can involve a lot of travel. From time to time, you’re bouncing back and forth between your home base and another state (or country). Somehow, for the past 13 months, my work had not involved any travel. I was staffed locally, while some of my peers were sent off to California, Honduras, what have you. I didn’t complain – there were things to get done in Chicago. But I recently found that I would be traveling week to week for my next engagement.

I had thought that I’d be excited when I got news that I’d start travelling, which I was. But you know what? I got jitters too. I was tempted to fear - I was going to a new city to work with a new set of people. I’d be spending most of my weeks in this new city, and I would know absolutely nobody there. I thought, Could this be right? Truth be told, I had gotten a little comfortable with what I knew. I had to get something to anchor me as I stepped out…

So I got word from the psalmist that calmed my heart. In Psalm 139, he marvels on just how secure he is God’s arms. He writes: Where can I go from your Spirit? Or where can I flee from your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold,You are there. If I take the wings if the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, And Your right hand shall hold me.

Where can I go from your Spirit? I was worried that I wouldn’t have any company where I was going, but the Psalmist tells me I already have company in God’s Spirit – and He’s the best company. There is no need for me to fear as I step out. Whether I rise, whether I settle; whether I make right turns or left, God is right there with me. He’s my omnipresent God. Even if I was to make a wrong turn, God will be right there at the end of that wrong turn, waiting to guide me back to the right path.

No worries for me as I step out. I am fully covered. The Psalmist tells me that even if I was to make my bed in hell, God will be there with me (talk about crazy love). Well, the place I’m traveling to might be foreign to me, but it surely isn’t hell. God is right there with me. I’ll be just fine.

My Wednesday night view: a bed of clouds

Soundrack To My Night: 7:37 PM

A little edgier tonight….

Do You Enjoy My Worship?

Locked up in a room. I seek to be with my father, God…and so I begin to sing. At first I sing words that other men have written, but then, my spirit speaks:

If I could have my way, I’d dress up in a gown; flowing white and gold. I’d walk up to you and take my place in front of your throne. And then…I’d dance my worship to you. In the midst of my dancing, I’d look at your face. I’d look for your smile, just to be sure that you are pleased. This is the place I imagine me to be. Just me, on this platform in front of you. And you’d look at me, pleased with every bit of me because you designed It. This is the place I imagine me to be. Right in front of you and your son, dancing my worship to you. Right in front of the elders, right amidst the angels. In a place sooooo intimate, no one wants to leave. Do you enjoy my worship…to you? Do you enjoy my worship?

If I could play a harp, I’d lay it on my lap. Then I’d strum songs in your ear, right over your head. I’d play my music and I’d sing my songs for you. To you, they are honey, they are milk. They are the dew of the morning, falling softly on your hair.  Do you enjoy my worship? I laugh to myself. Because I’m playing music to you, but indeed, you are playing me as your instument; Strumming me and pulling out the beauty in me. I laugh again. Your presence is so dear to me; then I realize…my presence so dear to you. You died to get it. You wanted me near to you. Simply put, you wanted me. I wanted to be wanted, but you had always wanted me. Now you have me. Do you enjoy my worship?

I laugh to myself. Every time I stand to worship, you hasten to my voice. I imagine you sit straight up in your seat, and you listen with an eager ear. You anticipate my sounds. Ha! I realize why the Devil hates me so much. Heaven used to anticipate his sounds. Heaven used to hasten to his music. Now, I’ve taken his place. You look at me eagerly. You anticipate my music. Do you enjoy my worship…to you?

If I could play a harp. I’d lay it on my lap.

I’d strum songs in your ear, right over your head.

You do enjoy my worship…to you. You do enjoy my worship

It’s like honey to you. It’s like milk to you;

The dew of the morning to you.

And it makes your heart melt.

A Little Closer

Here I am again. Wanting to be close, wanting to be near. Here I am wanting to place my head on your chest and hear your heart beat. And hear your heart’s desires….for me. I want to hear, I want to see what you wrote about me, ever before I began to walk this earth. Ever before my parents embraced me, and guided my body with their arms as I made my first clumsy steps through their living room floor.  I want to know where you planted me, in your grand scheme of things.

A song springs up in my heart….”pull me a little closer, take me a little deeper, I want to know your heart, I want to know heart” I second that. Even more, I want to be your friend. The one you can’t wait to tell your plans to before you ever implement them. Tell me. I’m all ears. I’m open. Do you think I’m ready for it? It keeps playing in my heart…“I want to know your heart…I want to know your heart.” I want your thoughts because they are the highest. I want your ways, your plans, because they are the most supreme. They won’t get me stuck, they can’t get me in a rut. I want your ideas because they make me secure, they make me confident. When I have them is when I am the most bold…Because I know they are right and perfect. “Pull me a little closer, take me a little deeper…I want to know your heart….I want to know your heart.  

 

 

He Thought She was What He Saw

I was inspired to post this again. Enjoy………….

Her body sixteen pounds lighter from the beatings of her past, she wore clothes three times her size to cover its awkwardness. The girl kept people at bay because she did not want to be let down again. She was recovering from her clash with a brick wall. Thus, in her dealings, she was fragile, insecure… trying to figure things out. But she had vowed that she would never be the same again.

This was the girl God decided to make his personal project. At this point in her life, she had no idea of what He was molding her to be. She did not know that He would completely free her from her addictions. She had no concept of the ideas He would later speak into her ear; no awareness of the great plans he had for her. Boy, was she in for a ride.

While she was yet in this caterpillar phase, she met a young man at a gathering place. She had an inkling, or perhaps a hope, that he was her knight, her one. But he was often surrounded by the opposite sex. The way to get his attention was to give in, just like they did; but she dared not betray the God that was working on her. So even though she cared for him, she knew she had to keep her distance.

Little did the young man know that God was brooding over her. However, he did not walk in the Spirit, so he had no access to a divine warning, saying “My son, look at her…watch her bloom…give her time.” He had no knowledge of the valiant woman that God was molding her to be. To make his choice, the man could rely only on his eyes, his brain, his body, which are all too lowly to conceive God’s plan on their own. He looked at her, and he judged that she was just what he saw: a skinny, unsure, awkward, and uptight woman…altogether unattractive. So he set his eyes on the ones that would give in.

But some time after, God’s work began to speak in this young lady. It spoke so powerfully, that even she could not hide it…and the young man noticed. She was bold, strong, assured, and beautiful. He was not sure what it was that had changed her, but he was attracted to it. So he watched and  he studied, and he decided that she was indeed a jewel. He reached out to her, made his cliché passes at her. But it was now too late. She knew they served two different masters, who could not be reconciled. She had to move on.

The young man had to settle for another woman – a sub-par choice. She had no regard or understanding of the King inside of him. He would later become aware of this. But every time he saw the jewel, he always remembered her as the one he was too blind to see.

A note to the young men: In your quest for that ONE, do not allow your eyes / your feelings / your body to make the decision for you. They will only make a below average choice. Rely instead on God. He will give you what and who is best for you, if only you will follow Him – Genesis 2: 18

A note to the ladies: This applies to you too. Switch the roles.

Soundtrack to My Night: 7:57 PM

THE LOST ARE FOUND

Dare to Dream…Again

How appropriate that today would be a day that I spend much in the Bible to understand the power of the potential within you. I turn on the TV and see that the biggest piece of news in the world is the second inauguration of our black president. Even bigger is what dress his black wife chose to wear for the night. There was a time that this could never be, as the society had written it.

I think on my own lifestyle as a young black woman. I go to a restaurant and expect top quality service. I drive in the night, trusting that I won’t be stopped by police because of my color. I graduated from a university that reputed around the world. My president and I are standing on one man’s dream – Martin Luther King. It was God’s vision buried deep in his heart and he dared to unearth it. He never knew us, but he spoke out from what was in his heart: someday, black people like myself and America’s president would exist. And 50 years later, so it is.

Every man – YOU and I included – was created with a mandate to mark the universe. How am I sure? When He made the first man and woman, God spoke to them saying, “Fill the earth, and subdue it.” In other words, this is your territory to create and dominate. We’re all born with that desire to dominate. Haven’t you noticed that every time you ask a child what they want to be, they reply with a dream that is soooo grand? You don’t have to teach a child to dream. It’s an innate, God given quality.

But somehow, as they grow older, most people trade their dreams for what society dictates: Go to school, stay out of trouble, get a job, buy some things, pay some bills, retire and die. I’ve gone to school, stayed out of trouble, I’ve gotten a job and I’m thankful for it. It’s nice to not have to keep my hand on the fuel pump at the gas station so that I don’t buy more $5 worth of gas. It’s nice to buy things I need without thinking twice about it. But the God in me says THERE IS MORE, so I cannot rest. More in me that keeps crying, “Let me out!”

There is much more in me than this job, this salary, this 401k, these vacation days demand of me. There are much more seeds in me “that grow into trees, that have fruit that have seeds, that grow into trees, that have fruit, that have seeds, that grow into trees, etc” – Myles Munroe. For generations to come. I dare to speak it out, and so shall it be.

My freedom is a product of the seed God put in Martin Luther King’s dream. That means that in my dreams, in your dreams, are seeds that grow into trees, that have fruit, that have seeds, that grow in trees etc. Things that will mark the earth forever when they find expression. If they are dreams that keep tugging at your heart and won’t let you escape, that’s your future screaming at you. Don’t you dare sleep on them. Don’t you dare allow anyone to tell you they are worthless. Don’t you dare allow anyone to tell you they are childish. Don’t you dare allow anyone to tell you that you can’t do it.

PS: I dare you to tell me that these videos do not stir up your heart. Watch now: The Power of Your Potential